My Journaling Journey: Part 4

April 11, 2017

This is the 4th part of My Journaling Journey. You can read my previous posts here:

 

My Journaling Journey: Part 1

My Journaling Journey: Part 2: Life Purpose

My Journaling Journey: Part 3: My Struggle

Here in this posts I will share some Photos of my Diary:

(December 3, 2015: I was trying to work on my Blog Waytolive.co)

(December 5, 2015: Days going by. Trying to get better. Working on my WordPress Child Theme.)

(December 13, 2015: I was busy in my Blogging and designing my theme for Blog)

(December 15, 2015: Actually it’s called Semi Planche Push Up instead of Opposite Push Up. And I was also doing Abdominal Curl)

(January 13, 2016: I had gone to get admission in the Local Campus, in 3 years Bachelor in Arts with major in English.)

(February 11, 2016: Murgiya is very far from where I live. It is 50 Km away. So, while constructing my house everyday I had to travel +100 Km equal to +5-6 hours in Bus and walk more than 5-6 Km in scorching sun, it was really hard and bad.)

(March 22, 2016: Days were really busy going and coming from Murgiya, looking after the construction  of my house. Everything was messed up during this time. I stopped exercising, meditating and also blogging.)

(April 21, 2016: Actually it’s 2073 instead of 2072 but sometimes things get jumbled up. This is my last Journaling. Since then I haven’t journal.)

This is the last page of my Journaling. I haven’t wrote in my diary since April 27, 2016. I am thinking about starting it someday again.

My Journaling Journey: Part 3: My Struggle

April 11, 2017

This is the 3rd Part of My Journaling Journey. You can read my previous posts here:

My Journaling Journey: Part 1

My Journaling Journey: Part 2: Life Purpose

Here in this post I will share about my depression and struggle with life.

(April 22, 2015: I was at Kathmandu at that time. My Mom had recently arrived from Israel, may be couple of days ago, I had gone to receive my Mom and right now we were living in Hotel. One of the problem I face with being around my Mom is: I feel uncomfortable around her, I don’t hate her but I don’t feel comfortable when she is around me. Part of the reason might be I have spent almost 80-90% of my life away from her, may be that’s why I don’t feel easy when I am around her. But when she is away in Abroad, we are very good, we talk for hours.)

(April 22, 2015: We, mom and me were at Kathmandu inorder to convince my Dad to create my Citizenship, but he is very selfish and greedy and he don’t love us. This was the time, I felt most weak, I felt most down. He thought we were coming for his money and property and he was afraid that if he created my citizenship he will be obliged to give his property to me. Moreover my Final Exam of Grade 12 was coming, I guess it was supposed to start from March 2nd. Atlast we returned home because he started making various excuses and we became sure that he will not help. After couple of days, after Earthquake of 2015, my father’s big brother helped me to create citizenship using Kinship Certificate. Next day my father called him, scolded him for issuing my citizenship. Moreover I haven’t met my father since that day, I don’t want to, he is already married to another women, have children, and also I don’t want his property, I don’t want anything from him.) 

(April 25, 2015: I think I don’t have to say anything about this photo. Moreover we had just arrived from Kathmandu in the morning of April 24 in Night Bus.)

(April 25, 2015: Earthquake Day. My exam of grade 12 also got postponed because of Earthquake. After Earthquake Mom and I went to Syangja with my Father’s Big Brother and he helped me to get my citizenship.)

(May 9, 2015: I don’t think I have to say anything about this.) 

(May 16, 2015: Yeah, I was getting depressed a lot during those days. My best friend was diary, he helped me a lot, he listened to me, stayed with me. I was getting angry at everyone, I was frustrated with life.) 

(May 28, 2015: Just a another day.)

(May 31, 2015: Whenever some thought used to come or whenever I used to feel alone, I just to journal. I used to express all my problems and daily life with my Diary, like it was my best friend, like it is my family members or close person.)

During this time, I got depressed a lot. But my journaling habit helped me a lot.

 

My Journaling Journey: Part 2 : Life Purpose

April 11, 2017

This is the 2nd Part of My Journaling Journey. For more clarity you can read my previous post: My Journaling Journey: Part 1.

Here in this post, I will describe how my Life Purpose has evolved to present condition:

“Life is like an onion if you peel one layer of onion other will come, if you peel it again another shows up and if you keep peeling, at the end only the core of onion remains.” So, here I am still peeling my onion.

(April 18, 2012: At that time, I thought this is my Life Purpose. I was a big fan of animals, still am, I love animals, their innocence. So, I thought everyone are working for the welfare of people but no one is working for animals, hence I made my mind to work for welfare of animals.)

(February 19, 2014: Actually the date is wrong, it should be something like this 2070/11/07 but who has the time to consult calendar everytime you want to journal. So, here I am trying to figure out my real life purpose. This is just one of the example, I have tried many things, I have asked many questions to myself.)

(February 19, 2014: This is Part 2nd of Deep Soul Searching. You are supposed to write everything that comes into your head without any restrictions until you feel deeply connected to the statement. And you are allowed to take as much time as you can, you are even allowed to leave it for a while and again join it if you feel bored.)

(February 19, 2014: This is Part 3rd of Deep Soul Searching.)

(February 19, 2014: This is Part 4th of Deep Soul Searching.)

(February 19, 2014: This is Part 5th of Deep Soul Searching. February 21, 2014: I saw the dream.)

(February 21, 2014: Part 2nd: I saw the dream.)

Right now my life Purpose is: “To live everyday to the fullest and to get better and better everyday in everyway. To help other to live better life.”

I guess Journaling helped me a lot to understand about myself and know about myself.

My Journaling Journey: Part 1

April 11, 2017

Well, I have been Journaling since I was 15/16 years old. Actually I used to be a shy and lonely kid, I guess I still am but I have changed a lot, improved a lot. Throughout those years Journaling has helped me a lot in my dark days, when I had no one to share my plan, my pain, my stories. It has been like my friend perhaps my best friend I guess. It has helped me to understand myself, look into myself.

Here in this Post, I want to share some Photos of my Diary:

(April 18, 2012: At that time, I thought I had figured out everything; Who I wanted to be, What I wanted to do with my life etc. Surprising fact is I actually got 85.5% in SLC .i.e Class 10.)

(January 30, 2013: This was during the time when I was studying in class 10. I was sick, so I got out of the hostel even though staying in Hostel was compulsory for all the students who were studying in class 10. Moreover the funny fact was: Previously, about 2-3 weeks before getting sick, I had wished for being ill so that I wouldn’t have to give the exam. Well, that wish came true but still I had to give the exam: all those Boring Pre-Send Up, Send Up and Pre-SLC.)

(February 5, 2013: Back then, it was totally different there used to be a lot of load-shedding, so called Power Deficit. So, I had to burn the candle to study. Well, I had already checked up my Health in the Hospital, where they gave me medicine for 1 months but there was nothing written in my report. So, out of my curiosity I researched over internet using my Nokia X3 and found the similarity with Thrombotic Thrombocytopenic Purpura (TTP): you can google it, yeah it was that bad, my whole legs and hands were swollen, it was really red. For me, it seemed like my small nerves got ruptured due to too much physical workout. Yeah, even at that age I could do +50 continuous normal Push Up, +10 One Leg Squat or Up Down, 20 Clap Push Up and also +15 Handstand Push Up using the support of wall. I thought I suffered from TTP due to much Physical Activity, but I became fine with just one months of medicines and I also discontinued exercise. I still don’t know what actually caused me that kind of disease.) 

(February 10, 2013: Actually I only got 85.5% in my class 10 but I was a dreamer, still am. Hence, my aim or goal was to get 92.25%, which didn’t came true but that hasn’t stopped me from dreaming and setting even bigger goals in my life.)

(January 13, 2014: At that time I was enrolled in class 11 in Science Faculty, but I was struggling academically. I was trying everything but I wasn’t progressing, things weren’t going good. I was still planning and setting goals but actually I got only 68.4% in class 11 and 65.2% in class 12. )

(January 13, 2014: This is the 2nd page of above page.)

(January 2014: This was my master plan, which never got into the reality. It’s seemed like Castle in the Air. Part of the reason was: I wasn’t consistent, I wasn’t regular, sometimes I wanted to be this, sometimes that. Moreover I guess I wasn’t emotionally involved with it, may be it wasn’t something I really wanted to do or become.)

(February 3, 2014: This is just the Part of Me. Actually I had already completed my book Teenage Guidance during the Holiday after class 10 but it was only in copy .i.e in paper form, only Addiction Part was typed, that year I bought a Laptop Dell 3421 which I still use and I typed all the remaining part using my Laptop and Re-Published my Book Teenage Guidance during the Holiday after class 11.)